MINKSTOCK2000
August
Mink here. How's it going?
Well... my ghetto crack apartment was
inundated with dudes this week and
weekend (and actually still is, Jink won't fucking leave ; )
Jink: Word. Free cats and pork, she'll need dynamite to get my arse outta
here.
Day 1: Jink arrives. We quickly get drunk and do laundry. (not in that
order) Publix rejoices at new lap to be had. (that's my cat) (shutup)
I shower but am interrupted by frantic banging on bathroom door.
I hear "*muffled* *garbled* FIRE! *incoherent* FIRE!
I soap myself and get a towel only to emerge to see Jink panting breathlessly
and wide eyed by the stove.
It seems I had forgotten that I had set some scented candle wax to boil and
it had burst into flames.
After banging on the bathroom door for 5 minutes, Jink wisely decided to
douse the flames herself.
Jink: It was big and scary, really!
Mink: Way not to panic dude.
Crisis averted.
I spend an hour scrubbing wax off the stove.
Smells great though.
We drink more.
Day 2: Jink awakes in my bathroom in a bra and sarong. I get a pedicure and
Jink watches in rapt attention. She buys me (I didn't wanna mess up my new
sexy toes) a sexy black strappy shoe sandal number (from payLESS WHOO HOOO!)
and flirts with a 14 year old boy. Pokemon cards are exchanged with phone
numbers and bed times. After visiting several wrong apartments and
inquiries if she is looking for white people by the local crack dealers
Tsubaki arrives at 2am (via cab. we love her but we love vodka more)
Jink: Very true.
Day 3: I wake bright eyed and bushy tailed (actually a 9am call from Alexis
to which I stuttered wha?who?huh?airport?kay) and sing Snow White tunes in
shower while Jink and Tsubaki slept in a darkened cum encrusted living room
floor. I step over their inert bodies and boobs to whisk myself off to pick
up Alexis and Urd. Publix is left perusing the available and potential love.
I pick up Alexis and Urd.
Hooray!
Even more fab in person even while severely jet lagged and decrepit. We dine
on southern things in a restaurant full of dying old people.
We return home.
Tsubaki and Jink have arisen and rinsed.
There is more boob grabbing and joy.
Although gray and rainy we cruise to the fantablous Florida beachside. We
walk pensively and watch surfers wipe out.
Alexis strips to her under-roos and runs into the surf like a luscious Calvin
Klein model.
We watch in awe.
We then watch the surf soak all of her clothing that we promised to keep nice
and dry so she wouldn't be all damp and cold..
We feel badly.
We proceed damp and wind blown to a diner and watch Urd eat grilled cheese
sandwiches. (which we discover, is all Urd will and ever consumes again for
the duration of her stay)
Urd and Alexis make love to my cat.
Jink: *cums*
We shop and then eat crab legs on my living room floor.
Urd watches in awe.
Sai: MONSTERS!
Mink&Jink: Fag.
Alexis drinks us all under the table and we collapse in a large sleepy
hamster pile.
Day 4: I wake to the sound of my alarm. 4am, Tsubaki is already headed home.
(Yes, she stayed ALMOST 24 hours) I fall back to sleep without a good-bye.
Sorry Tsubaki.
Jink: I said good-bye.
Mink: Goooood Jink.
I wake again! Jink and I have a tickle fight in our panties (that's for you
Adam) and I emerge victorious.
Jink: And I emerge pregnant.
Alexis wakes. She too is impregnated.
Somehow, even though Urd has had two naps the day before, did not drink a
drop and went to bed hours before the rest of us, we must all take turns
sitting on her face to wake her up.
She rises and makes another grilled cheese sandwich.
We go to beach.
We all bake and frolic in the waves.
Jink: I was turned into a kosher pickle.
Mink: (She was salty) (I didn't get it either)
We proceed to a fab sushi joint.
We eat cheap Japanese tail.
Except Urd who ordered a grilled cheese sandwich.
We go to Friendlys (some of us have never had the joy) And it was distinctly
unfriendly. We all gained 5 more pounds and left.
More drinking and anime watching.
Stripper arrived late.
We make a limited edition video documentary of our stay, starring Publix
(shutup) cleavage and the RW action figures.
Sekmet: YOU LOVE ME, YOU REALLY LOVE ME. *beams*
Jink and me stayed up till the butt crack of dawn talking to Urd. Alexis,
having consumed most of a bottle of valium and 3/4 of our vodka supply snored
in the other room.
Urd inspires me to write another Arslan fic, which I have half written in my
mind already. (Thanks Olga!) Presents are exchanged. (Okay, Urd gave us
presents and we cooed) (I got a Daryoon card) (to evan: AHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!! :
PPPP~~~)
We sleep the sleep of drunks.
Day 5: We wake and preen.
Urd makes a grilled cheese sandwich.
Alexis and Urd pack.
Publix is inconsolable.
We drive to airport and after a last moment photograph (thanks scuzzy van
dude!) we make our tearful goodbyes.
Alexis and Urd drive off to Orlando into the sunset.
Jink and I go home and watch terrible movies and get drunk.
Mink: I sense a theme.
Day 6: Jink was SUPPOSED to go home. We scraped ourselves off the floor and
head for the airport.
Airplane delayed.
Fog in NYC.
After a tedious 15 minutes of waiting, Jink decides to screw that noise and
what the fuck, stay until Saturday.
Lies are told to employer and close family.
Guilt ensues.
Jink eats pork
Guilt is gone.
We buy more vodka and rent The Talented Mr Faggily.
We return home to write a stupid Minkstock letter.
Jink: *giggles*
Mink: *teehees*
Publix: Fags.
Well, gotta go get drunk again cuz this town sucks goat balls and we are both
broke.
-End Transmission-
~Mink&Jink